Self-acceptance of being an open lesbian creates a higher self-esteem
and gives you more power in life. When you're ready to open that door
to find a lesbian significant other, there's lots of roads and
opportunities for that path.
Edit Steps
- 1Become comfortable being lesbian. Sometimes, when you hide your sexuality, others may think you're not lesbian and won't try to kick up a relationship with you for fear of a let-down. Come out to loved ones you feel comfortable coming out to. The more you are open with your sexuality, the better chance you have of other girls picking up on that and wanting to be with you.
- 2Introduce yourself to people. Not just girls you think are attractive, but men, too. They could have connections to single girls. The more outgoing and friendly you are, the more inviting you will be to girls. Keep discussions lightweight and away from yourself to be more appealing.
- 3Join an LGBT group in your community. You will get to talk to people who are going through some of the same issues you are facing - and you might find a date.
- 4Join an online dating service. Lots of dating sites allow you to search members around you. It's a good feature that you can easily find lesbian girls who live near you. Browse around first to make sure the site has local active members who interest you before you commit to paying a fee.
- 5Be yourself. Being someone you're not just to get with someone is a big no-no. If a girl doesn't like who you are naturally, it won't work out in the long run even if you do hook up briefly.
- 6Show that you're interested, but avoid being too forward. If you come on too strong, it's a turn-off whether she was interested or not. Smile and show confidence. Be friendly and welcoming, and definitely go talk to her, but don't be cocky, pushy or aggressive.
- 7Take your time. Don't be in a rush to get just any girlfriend. You have your whole life to find your soul mate. It's very hard to find Ms. Right when you're dragging around all the time with Ms. Wrong because you made promises too early and didn't give yourself enough time to play the field a little bit. Finding a love that will last forever doesn't always happen in a flash.
- 8Ask her out. Don't wait for what feels like eternity for her to ask. She could be a bit shyer and nervous about asking you out, and taking that giant step can make her yours.
Edit Tips
- Smile a lot! Give a gay girl a knowing "Hey, I'm a lesbian, too!" smile.
- Show off your pride by wearing rainbow jewelry. If gay girls don't know you're a lesbian, they won't hit on you.
- Act confident, but not cocky.
- Don't try too hard, the girls will see if you are comfortable in your own skin.
- Get to know other LGBT people. Even if you're not interested in them romantically, they can be good contacts to other people, and having a gay support network of friends will help you feel comfortable with yourself!
Edit Warnings
- People may be prejudiced against you once you get a girlfriend. Remember to take pride in yourself.
- Ignore homophobic comments which make you uncomfortable. Those people are prejudiced who disagree with your sexuality and may be trying to bully you.
- Watch out for gossiping friends. If you tell them you are a lesbian, be aware they may tell the whole school. It is better if you "out" yourself when you are comfortable.
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